Thursday, 22 December 2016

SO KOKO Life Topics | 3 Reasons Why It Didn't Happen

Maybe it was an ordained accident, Maybe you're just curious to find out what 'it' is then you'll be on your way or maybe you're like me: There are things in your life that should have happened that haven't.

2016 has been quite the year :

It's left us with many unanswered questions or simply answers we just didn't want to hear - Let's not get into Trump and Brexit talks tonight, PLEASE!

Why am I not where I thought I'd be? Ought to be? You're expectant but whatever 'it' is, is not coming or is doing 'African time' on your life? ('fashionably late', basically). 
But before you start binding and rebuking, circling your head with your hand then *clicking* it away, saying God Forbid! LOL (Africans are funny). Remember I don't know what 'it' is for you, but in these 3 parts I will give you an idea of why it hasn't happened yet. So, can we talk?

1. You said You Wanted 'it', But You Didn't

That business, that house, that 'break' you "need", that 'marriage' or whatever. All these wants, why don't you have them?
I think maybe deep down you're afraid. While your dreams should scare you, you should not remain scared. Deep down there was a seed of doubt, fear and, dare I say, relief.
Ask yourself, do you fear a rejection by others or are you yourself rejecting the idea that YOU can pull this off, that YOU are good enough? 

You say you wanted it but you did't and the B side to this point is that: OK you want it, but you're secretly OK that you dont have it, now.

  • DO want to buy a house BUT not having a mortgage to worry about is OK right now, you know. 
  • DO want to get married BUT I don't want to "give up" my freedom, you know
  • DO want that break BUT booking time off, ah that flight, ah hotel prices, ah it's not a good time right now, you know
  • DO want to have a family BUT only having to worry about myself right now is OK, you know.

2. You Wanted it, You Did Everything to prepare, but Life said you Didn't

Sometimes you do everything right to prepare, but it just seems to walk pass you. If we could all make ourselves wealthy, happy, and successful from the onset, Who here would choose to be poor, unhappy and unsuccessful? Who chooses failure?

Some things are just out of your hands. 

This life can be as unreliable as the British weather, which is why people tend to lean on something else i.e. spirituality. Faith in God, faith in an alternative deity, chance, star signs or the Ostrich approach = simply bury their heads in the sand.
But I can't let you off the hook with this one. While there are things out of our hands, What are you doing with what's in your hands and what is still within your reach?

Have you ever thought you wanted something so bad and then it comes later than you expected, so you appreciate it better or it just doesn't happen at all and over time you appreciate that better?

There are some things that you should have, but you don't have it, because you have not prepared for it or demonstrated you can handle it.

3. You just weren't SMART

Wait, I'm not throwing insults. Let's recap, let's say you throw everything said in Part 1 and 2 back in my face:You wanted to and tried to ( gba point 1) The things you can't do, you don't. You do what you can and it's still not happening (gba, point 2). If 'it' really is meant to happen then what other reason is there that it hasn't happened yet?

Review the things you want, maybe you haven't been SMART with your objectives:

S - Is it Specific?  M - Is it Measurable - Is it Attainable? Is it Action-orientated?R - Is it Realistic?  - Is it Timely? Is it Trackable?

Ask yourself these questions. You may find that you have to revert back to point 2a because 'it' was not for you to make happen. It's attainable but the actions required are not by you.

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