Thursday, 2 February 2017

SO KOKO Life Topics | 5 Signs He's Still Sucking at The Breasts

And they're not yours....
Okay, that was a little crude of us, but we had to be sure we had your full attention.

We're jumping straight into this month of 'love' with the next 4 Life Topics dedicated in and around relationships. We know, big YAWN!  'big kid'.  They say Communication is they key to a healthy relationship. But there's another big C, Control - the key to most unhealthy relationships. 

 Relationships are hard work, but when you're feeling rundown and burden, a mother before your time these could be signs he's seeking a parent not a partner:

Women want to feel wanted and for some women, they get lost in the sauce when a guy is vulnerable with them. You've got the mop and bucket ready to clean up any mess. You think you're in control because you're making the decisions, you're 'calling the shots', giving it all - but he's giving you what exactly? so who's really in control aye? ..

Here are are 5 signs you've got a man child:

1. Wants to be waited on and refuses to do basic things for himself

'Abeg you do me this one favour', 'I won't normally ask, actually dont worry' but they know you, you can't resist caring, worrying, rescuing. 'no no what is it,you can talk to me'.  Sound a little familiar?
There's nothing wrong in helping a guy, but how are you really helping him. Note the most trivial things, can you send this email for me, can you call these people for me, can you can you can you...well, why can't he?

2. Needs you to micromanage his life

We could all probably do more, but these guys are operating below their potential. 
The only woman who can tolerate a man-child IS HIS MOTHER or a woman who likes to. An uninvolved mum or a mother who is too involved ( aka. Smother) cause these guys to under-function.  They encourage help but nothing really changes. They just take the 'pep-talks', because that gives them attention they seek, which brings us nicely to No. 3...

3.Wants Constant reassurance

Along with constantly needing direction in their lives..FROM OTHERS. Another constant, is the need for reassurance. 'My Man' and 'Who's a good boy?' really don't differ here. It's a bottomless pit, he needs to be reassured you won't leave at every given moment, he still has your attention, you're doing everything you can. 

4. Probably has had several failed relationships

Stones and glass houses right? In most cases a guy opening up about his past and 'feelings' is good thing. We deem it as honest, some even, 'intimacy'. But this guy tells you about all these sad stories of how this girl cheated, this one left and that one left and they're all short-lived or overlapping
 that has you continually performing to show that you're The One and you wont fail like the others.

5. Everytime you try to leave, something keeps pulling you back

As much as it's been to spot the man child you might have or might have dodged, it's also good to not alot of it boils down to why you attract them/attracted to them in the first place. With all the above, it' hard to leave or walk away when you're a nurturer, protective, an all cards in kind of girl.
FYI. If  didn't at least hum number 5, then we just don't know who you are! But to the point at hand what's pulling you back, isn't necessarily love, it's dependency - It's draining. 

The strapline to this wild title was, 'And they're not yours' and that's because they don't have to be. Anyone will do.  Reality is, he's just moving from caregiver to caregiver, so read between the lines.

Girls, don't think you're safe. Guys, we've got you. Next week we're coming for the ladies with...

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